please listen

Sometimes I feel like im trying to do too many things at once, creatively anyway. My ultimate goal is to create video games. I have always wanted to make games, but I also wanted to make monsters and characters and stuff. I had a character in my head so I try to draw them. Then I wanted to learn how to make music after hearing too many game OST's and thinking to myself, "man this is so good, I wanna make music too" so I took music theory and piano classes.

• I want to make the game
• I want to make the art
• I want to make the music

And I think im ruining myself by trying to do everything. Im not really focusing on one subject. I feel like the onion knight from final fantasy. I can do everything, I can perform every spell, weild every weapon...im just not very good at it. But with enough level grinding i'll eventually master all the skills and perform 999 damage to whatever I see. I have the creative drive, and I know what im doing in all three subjects (at least I think so) but it will take longer than I hope for my talents to come to fruition.

When they eventually do though, I will be a threat to be reckoned with. I mean who else designs the game, characters, and music? The only man that comes to mind is Daisuke Ishiwatari. Hot damn Daisuke sama, you're so cool! Hey, we both voice act too....Hmmmm

Is Daisuke Ishiwatari my SPIRIT ANIMAL?! I even kind of look like him....HNG! His hair is so sick.

Lets take a moment to appreaciate one of his games, lets listen to some fucking GUILTY GEAR, SON!

So yeah, in my last post I admitted I was a lazy sack of shit. In this post im saying im finally getting shit done. I want to be a game designer, but I was content sitting around doing nothing, I figured if I didn't persue my goals, that I wouldn't get hurt if I failed at them. Well thats a cowards say of thinking.

Im lerning C++ on my free time, come next semester i'll be taking entry level computer science, that way i'll be on my merry way to learn how to code. Right now im dicking around with Visual basic. I also have unity 3D, the free version, so I can screw around with code there.

Other than that not much to report. I haven't touched my piano since summer began. I should get on that....As far as my art skills, I got a book of dynamic poses. (Over 1,200 so it claims) so yeah, I randomly turn a page and draw the first thing I see. I notice im getting better, hooray for me. I haven't bothered to update my art thread, don't feel like it.

Outside of bettering myself, i've gotten into comic books. I want a good obscure hero, and I found Moon Knight, and Moon Knight is a fucking badass, I recommend him to anyone that wants a nice hero that isn't actually super. He's just a normal dude that relies on gadgets like batman but unlike batman he's not even smart, in fact the guys a dumbass and prefers to punch first ask questions later. A wonderfully flawed and human feeling hero. Read it.

I remember I started my Newgrounds account because I wanted to be an artist. I was inspired by Lazymuffin, Oney and HotDiggedyDemon. When I initially started it in 2008 I was already making promises of content to come, content I clearly never delivered.

I realize now I was someone who liked to dream, more than actively attempt what I was dreaming about. I would fantisize about being an artist, I would fantisize about being a musician. I want to make content, but I didn't put in any effort to actually trying to accomplish those goals. I was all talk, I posted concept "art" or a script and then completely abandoned any project I was working on.

I dont consider myself an artist anymore, in order to be an artist I have to actually create. Im just a dreamer. if you dont actively try to create, you aren't an artist either. I lied to myself all these years, calling myself an artist and I notice some people do the same. Both I and them remain unfulfilled. Very few people actually persue what they want it seems. Im not an artist, but I want to be. It starts with not lying to myself. I lied to myself to avoid work, I would rather dream than make what I longed for a reality.

I really am passionate about this field of work. I want to create stories and worlds, I want to make interesting characters. I want to affect my audience, make them feel emotions. I feel I can do that but I need to actually put effort into doing it. Im not lying to myself anymore. Im not an artist, but im going to try my damnedest to make sure I become one. Im done with promising content. I draw, and study actively. I wont upload anything until im truely satisfied with my work. Im not abandoning projects anymore, I will see something to the end. I've wasted so many years day dreaming, I dont want to be a dreamer anymore.

Read about how cool I am.Here's my art thread. watch me learn and grow and junk.

Anyway, im going to juggle both art and music. I got pretty good at piano but I want to compose original works, so im joining music theory. I still cant play by ear, im trying to advance as quickly as possible. Hopefully i'll have something up, if at all maybe a cover of some sort.

My art thread.
On a very important side note my favorite fighting game and easily one of my top 10 games ever made; thats right, Skullgirls raised a crap ton of money in an indiegogo campaign. The game will receive 5 new characters, 7 new stages, and a bunch of voice packs, you can go ahead and look at the list on this page if you want specific rewards, all free.
YEAH!

Now comes voting. The catch for the third and fourth character in the indiegogo campaign is the fans get to vote who they are. This is available only to donors however. Rules and a list of characters along with ideas for the characters and how they will function in game is riiiiiight Here. If you contributed vote! You'll get an E mail supposedly.

Edit: Round 1 of voting! I voted for Feng, Issac, Scythana, and Hive!

have him comin' apart at the seams
as they dance in the laser beams tonight....

Follow me, follow me
your love is callin' me! callin' me!
take hold of me, like a sorcerer controlling me

Couldn't be any clearly, upon my magic mirror
your true nature callin' me.

It's what artists feel like!

Think before you post online, because whatever you post stays there FOREVER. I mean, what would your boss say if he saw that picture of your dick you posted? Of that video of you beheading your pet hamster Jonah? Or if those nudies of yourself end up on the projector screen at your high school reunion.

At the legion of doom.